Justin once argued with PLCs for a living. He won some. Lost some. Eventually, the PLCs stopped being the problem. Now he's a superintendent at a petrochemical company, which means he attends meetings, reads emails, and serves as a supply chain for the supply chain. To call it "his job" would be to undervalue the existence of meetings and emails. He has a team that manages capital projects. He coaches and guides them — that's the good part, the part that still feels like building something. The roasting is reserved for everyone else: the memos, the processes, the org-wide initiatives that land in his inbox like compliance confetti. He writes satire not because he hates corporate America, but because he's inside it, and the only options are laugh or dissolve. Lives in Louisiana. Has two dogs named after astronomers. Knows more about spreadsheets than anyone should.
View all authorsChapter 4
Learning Objectives
Upon completion of this chapter, practitioners should be able to:
Chapter 3
Learning Objectives
Upon completion of this chapter, the practitioner will be able to:
Chapter 2
Learning Objectives
Upon completion of this chapter, the practitioner will be able to:
Chapter 1
Learning Objectives
Upon completion of this chapter, the practitioner will be able to:
A CEO stands at the top of a Plinko board he didn't build, holding a chip he didn't ask for, about to drop it into an organization he doesn't fully understand. Bob Barker smiles from below. The audience is counting down. Compliance has never been more fun.
CONFIRMATION BY US™ Professional Estimation Validation Services Est. 2003 | Global Headquarters: McLean, Virginia
A familiar scenario has emerged across enterprise organizations:
You have communicated a figure. The figure has achieved stakeholder visibility. The figure now requires analytical substantiation retroactive to its initial communication.
Traditional consulting firms approach this scenario as a "budgeting failure." We recognize it as what it truly is: a documentation opportunity.
The following job posting appeared on LinkedIn for 11 seconds before being filled.
"I finished this book producing 10x more in half the time. The system works. I can't explain how, but it works."
— Verified Reader, Productivity Monthly
What if everything you thought you knew about productivity was only scratching the surface?
What if the real strategies — the ones that actually optimize your output — have been waiting for you this whole time, hidden in plain sight, accessible only to those willing to commit to the full system?
This is that system.
Twelve steps. Thirteen chapters. One destination.
You're about to begin.
"In the end, we are all just dogs on a couch, trying to breathe."
— Sagan, Day 47
Following the historic negotiations documented in the 60 Paws investigation, the parties have executed a formal bilateral agreement. The complete treaty text, including all fourteen articles and supporting appendices, is reproduced below for the official record.